I would like to tell you about a game.
It is a game that is a welcome and original addition to an already popular worldwide franchise. A game eagerly awaited by many up util the very day of release, produced and brought to fruition by a legendary developer.
It is a game whose new features add to an already classical genre, a game that heralds its forebears as much as it breaks new ground, a game that is a victory on a conceptual level as well as simply being fun.
The graphical advances between this incarnation of the franchise and the last are astounding to look upon. Likewise, the sound engineering and score are peerless. Attention has been paid to every aspect of the game, in order to bring the best possible experience to the player.
In this game, the levels are superbly designed, sumptuous to view and fun to explore, with many hidden treats for the observant player. The performance is superb, and the characterisation of enemies and allies alike is perfectly matched to the setting - which in itself is rendered supremely well.
Also - the fish swim away from you.
If you thought I was talking about the latest Call of Duty, then I'm sorry, but you're very, very misguided. Because I am clearly singing the praises of Mario 64.
And for fuck's sake, AAA games industry, stop making such shitty shooters that all play and look the same.