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Wednesday 10 December 2014

Inner Yule

So for a while I've been debating how to write a blog about Christmas - or specifically how I feel about it. This has proven harder than one would suspect. It's led to a lot of self-analysis which has led to even more self-analysis, et cetera, like staring into the mouth of Charybdis and counting the teeth.

What it really comes down to is that I have a series of traits that don't match with the festive target market, really.

I'm an introvert for one. The amount of social occasions and family get-togethers that happen over Christmas (it's called the party season for a reason) can swiftly lead to burnout. The extroverts flourish - the introverts wilt. Often ducking out of Christmas functions can lead to problems, too, as they tend to be important.

Also the whole family aspect is another issue. My family isn't what one would necessarily call close; on Christmas Day the only two members of my family that I will necessarily see are my mum and aunt. That'll be quite nice, but at the same time I can't get behind the whole message of half of the ads on TV.

I think perhaps the biggest thing that works my nerves about the season is linked to my depression. Winter makes it worse, which is no secret. Expectation can weigh heavy - everyone's happy, and if one amongst them isn't, it can really mess with their karma. Not being in the spirit of things, walking against the flow, isn't actually a choice for a lot of people. The shadow you sometimes find yourself under doesn't give a damn how many doors you have left to open on your advent calendar, which is hard to grasp for those that don't suffer the condition. that it? I think that's it.

I'm not trying to grinch anyone's holiday. Truly. This is how I feel - not how anyone else should feel, nor a condemnation of how anyone else feels. If you enjoy your Christmas, then fill your boots and more power to you.

Just...please don't look at people like they've grown a second head, if they're not rolling out the tinsel with you.

"Be kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle."